Trust rarely breaks in one moment. It thins through repeated micro-patterns: the delayed reply, the topic that always escalates, the apology that doesn't change behaviour.
Common patterns to watch for
- Pursue–withdraw cycles where one partner pushes and the other retreats
- Conflict avoidance that looks like peace but builds resentment
- Scorekeeping — keeping mental lists of who gave more
Recognising these patterns early gives you language for conversations that would otherwise feel personal and permanent.